The problem with most wedding checklists is that they are comprehensive without being useful. They tell you everything, which means they do not tell you what matters now.
Here is the checklist organized the way I actually think about it: by when decisions need to be made, not alphabetically.
The moment you get engaged: three decisions first.
Before you look at venues, before you start a Pinterest board, before you tell Instagram, make three decisions with your partner. What is your approximate budget? How many people do you want there? Do you want to get married locally or somewhere else?
Those three answers will tell you almost everything else. They determine which venues are even worth visiting, which vendors are in your price range, and how long you actually need to plan.
Twelve or more months out.
Book your venue. This is the first non-negotiable. Everything else — catering, band or DJ, florist — schedules around the venue date. Popular venues in most cities book twelve to eighteen months in advance. If you have a specific venue in mind, visit and hold the date before you do anything else.
Book your photographer. The photographers couples most want are usually booked just as far in advance as venues. If photography matters to you, treat it like a venue booking.
Eight to ten months out.
Book your caterer if separate from the venue. Book your DJ or band. Start researching florists. Begin dress shopping — most dresses need four to six months to arrive after ordering, plus alteration time.
Send save-the-dates. Especially if you have out-of-town guests who need to book travel.
Four to six months out.
Order your dress. Book hair and makeup. Finalize your guest list and order invitations. Meet with your officiant and begin thinking about ceremony structure and vows.
Book hotel room blocks for out-of-town guests. Many hotels will release unbooked rooms back to inventory 30 days before the event, so you are not on the hook for empty rooms.
Two to three months out.
Send invitations. Begin collecting RSVPs. Build your day-of timeline. Have final meetings with all vendors and confirm details in writing.
This is also when most couples start feeling the stress spike. The best thing I can tell you: the decisions that are still left at this point are almost all small ones. The big ones are done.
One month out.
Final dress fitting. Confirm your guest count with the caterer. Give your photographer the shot list. Make sure your wedding party knows exactly where to be and when.
Write your vows if you have not already. Do not leave them for the last week.
The week before.
Confirm arrival times with every vendor. Pack what you need the night before. Sleep.
The planning is done. Trust it.
With love, Verla